'I love my child but I don't really like him'.
They were the words that flowed out of my mouth (and mountains of tears) when Karen came to help me with my 3 year old son (N) all those months ago.
I knew I was not a bad mum but I had started to wonder over time what I was doing wrong to have N exhibit such daily challenging behaviours (he is only 3!, how can it be so hard to parent him). N is a loving sensitive but strong willed little boy very attached to his mummy. Since the age of 2 (when his brother came into this world) his behaviour had deteriorated.
He started refusing to eat any main meals but begged all day for snacks, descending into tantrums when he did not get his own way (which was most of the time and often about other things as well as food). He whined and shouted at me a lot of the time and towards the end, hit me when things weren’t going his way. This made me very anxious and upset and neither my husband and I knew what strategy to use. So we tried them all at various times and of course things got worse (and so did the arguments between each other).
When we finally admitted defeat and called in Karen (after a whole year), even after the first session I felt a big weight was lifted. She gave us fantastic strategies (our favourites being time out, the child’s game and the 5 minute warning) to deal with his bad behaviour and his challenging eating habits. She also looked at our family holistically and helped me understand why it had gone so wrong. Karen taught me and my husband (but mostly me), to tune my parenting to fit Noah’s personality and needs. Karen taught me how to talk to him at his level and use appropriate language. It took a few months but I can honestly say he is a different child and there is nothing I don’t like about him now.
There are so many challenges that have been resolved that I have not mentioned but if I just say, all have been resolved thanks to Karen. Our family is 100% happier. She has been our angel.
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